So far the weather in June has been less than desirable. By now, it was supposed to be sunny, hot, even humid with a temperature of 28 celsius, maybe 30 or higher. We had some lovely days but the weather has not been typical for June. June typically shares her brilliant heat and languid humidity of the long, hot summer to be. Now with each cool, cloudy day, I find myself getting grumpy and thinking “It’s not supposed to be like this.” Hmmm. Heard that one before?
“It’s not supposed to be like this.” “It’s supposed to be _______.”
Ah, the notion of how things are supposed to be.
The Land of Supposed To Be where should’s tower as high as mountain peaks, norms and conventionality rule the land and nostalgia rides high.
It’s not supposed to be like this. I’m supposed to be ____________ (fill in your blank). I’m not supposed to feel like this. I’m supposed to love my (fill-in-the-blank) career, work, spouse, child, friend, home, life.
According to whom? According to what? Where does it say that?
In the Land of Supposed To Be, the air is thinned out of authenticity, acceptance, grace, and love. It’s hard to breathe and human beings are prone to suffocation. The Land of Supposed To Be is known to be especially harmful to children.
Supposed to’s hit us at every age, gender, socioeconomic class. Each gender, each age has its own Supposed To Be’s. Ask a 10-year and he or she will tell you the Supposed To Be’s they’re subjected to. Ask an 80-year old and you’ll hear Supposed To Be’s specific to 80-year olds.
They are dream drainers and suck the living being out of our originality, our authenticity and our personal desires. The really tough part is when we come to believe that the Supposed To Be’s are our truth.
What lies outside of your Supposed To’s and Supposed To Be’s? Who are you when you are not who-you-are-supposed-to-be?
Sticking to the story of how summer is supposed to be and what I am supposed to be doing has me sticking with the history, convention, tradition and nostalgia of summers past. I’m sticking with what I know and lose my agility, flexibility, creativity, and sense of possibility. I miss out on new opportunities to create unique, special memories, discoveries and connections. That’s a whole other land.