Gawd Forbid we are complex: Accepting complexity in ourselves

complexblogphoto There are moments in life that can be challenging and confusing for us. Making sense of it, trying to understand life, others and ourselves can be like figuring out some intricate moving 4D puzzle. Very difficult and overwhelming. Instead of staying with the overwhelm, we often choose to simplify how we see others, simply how we see the world, and simplify our sense of self to understand and manage difficult situations.

So we’ll take a quiz, fill out a questionnaire or complete an assessment that will help us figure ourselves out and give us THE answer - which career is best for us, who is best for us to mate with, what food is best for us, etc. They can help us and they also validate what we already know about ourselves.

“What’s your astrological sign? What Myers Briggs type are you? Are you a Boomer, Gen X, Gen Y, Millenial? What classification are you in the DSM-V? What political party do you support? What Ayurvedic type are you?”

“Gawd forbid” we are complex. Gawd forbid that we be textured with many layers. Gawd forbid that we continue to be revealed to ourselves.

Being “this” type or “that” label restricts you and me and us from stretching into new places. We are so much more than being slotted into some category for someone to understand us, or make us safe to them. We are so much more than being slotted into a type so we understand ourselves better.

It might lessen the fear, It might quieten the Saboteur voice(s), It might temper the anxiety, when a quiz or an expert says you are this or that.

Perhaps this is why as we mature, we understand less. Our capacity to embrace complexity expands with maturity, gently moving us away from the all-or-nothing, black-and-white constructs of meaning making. Being able to tolerate complexity includes holding duality, this and that, paradoxical ideas, and seemingly conflicting thoughts and beliefs.

“Gawd forbid” that we have nuances. Gawd forbid that we do not have the answer, have an answer, amidst the chaos.

It takes away our opportunity to embrace our colourful layers to become this and that to be this and that to believe this and that to be young and old attractive and ugly smart and naive serious and silly strong and weak.

It takes away the possibility to be more to expand our sense of self to deepen our spiritual understanding to heal ourself to carve our own way to grow in the spaces that we choose to be human.

It takes away the fullness of understanding ourselves, to connect with each other to cross generation, race, religion, culture, gender.

We contain within us a diversity of beliefs, ideas, contradictions, perspectives and ages. Accepting the wholeness of our complexity connects us to our innermost peace and joy.